Showing posts with label Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jokes. Show all posts
Thursday, 19 August 2010
Tuesday, 10 August 2010
Thursday, 22 July 2010
Wednesday, 21 July 2010
Don't pee in the water!
Thousands of tourists enjoy surfing artifical waves in Asia's largest indoor flotative pool in the scenic area of "Dead Sea of China", in Suining County, southwest China's Sichuan Province, July 20, 2010
Monday, 19 July 2010
Wednesday, 14 July 2010
Tuesday, 13 July 2010
England soccer team has new kit sponsors
The new sponsors of the England team are: TOTAL, fcuk and UPS.
Friday, 9 July 2010
Thursday, 8 July 2010
Monday, 28 June 2010
Hot topic of conversation...
Clearly over the line...
· What's the difference between the England team and a tea bag? The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
- What do you call an Englishman in the knockout stages of the World Cup? A referee.
· Three hours of football and Robert Green is still England's top scorer.
· What's the difference between a faulty jet engine and Wayne Rooney? The jet engine eventually stops whining.
· What's the difference between Wayne Rooney and Shrek? Shrek can save the day.
· Osama bin Laden has just released a new TV message to prove he is still alive. He said that the England Team performance on Saturday was completely s**t. British intelligence have dismissed the claim, stating that the message could have been recorded anytime in the last 44 years.
· Robert Green - The only man to leave Africa without catching anything .
· In a statement from broadcasting house, all future England games will now be shown on the gay porn channel. It is thought that 11 arseholes being regularly shafted is too explicit for regular TV.
· I can't believe we only managed a draw against a s**t team we should easily have beaten......I'm ashamed to call myself Algerian.
· The England team went to visit an orphanage in South Africa this morning, "its so good to put a smile on the faces of people with no hope, constantly struggling, and facing the impossible" said Jamal Omboto, aged 6.
· Fifa have released a statement saying the fan didn't break into the dressing room after all, but was let in by Rob Green.
· What's the difference between Rob Green's spill and BP's spill?
- Robert Green has got a cap for his.
· Fabio Capello was wheeling his shopping trolley across the supermarket car park when he noticed an old lady struggling with her bags of shopping. He stopped and asked, "Can you manage dear?" To which the old lady replied, "No way. You got yourself into this f*****g mess, don't ask me to sort it out..."
· The FA have launched an inquiry to find out how a fan found his way into the dressing room. And another enquiry into how Aaron Lennon found his way into the dressing room.
Friday, 25 June 2010
Ardi Rizal trundling around on his toy truck!
THESE are the first shocking pictures of smoking toddler Ardi Rizal - who throws tantrums if he can't puff 40 cigs a day.
The Sun told on Saturday how the two-year-old got hooked after dad Mohammed gave him a fag at 18 months.
Now he weighs 4st and trundles round on a toy truck blowing smoke rings - too unfit to run with other kids.
Mum Diana, 26, wept: "He's totally addicted. If he doesn't get cigarettes, he gets angry and screams and batters his head against the wall. He tells me he feels dizzy and sick."
Ardi will smoke only one brand and his habit costs his parents £3.78 a day in Musi Banyuasin , Indonesia .
Officials have offered to buy the family a car if he quits.
But fishmonger Mohammed, 30, said: "He looks pretty healthy to me. I don't see the problem."
Monday, 21 June 2010
Friday, 18 June 2010
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